Single channel communication

July 8, 2012 § Leave a comment

As a heavy Twitter user, I share my life with an online community – some of which I know, others I don’t. It felt natural to me to share what I was going through. I knew it would be meaningful to some, morbid and/or insignificant to others. The responses I received, although only 160 characters a piece, gave me a small sense of comfort.

I also wanted to convey my situation in my own words. A lot of people were contacting me to talk about what had happened – I avoided every single phone call. I couldn’t be bothered explaining a hundred times, in different ways, to different people what had happened. I didn’t have the emotional energy.

I posted this picture the day after Rèmy died. My partner and I watched the sunset from the 5th floor of Middlemore Hospital where I had a room in the Gynecological Care Unit, looking out over Mangere. It was a beautiful sunset. We pulled the chairs to the window and watched it quietly, reflecting… thinking… supporting each other.

I wrote that night that watching that sunset was a reminder that time will heal, and that there is always light after darkness.

My best friend had bought the tiny baby casket that Rèmy would eventually be buried in. We had it in the room with us. Having it there was one of the things that enabled us to move forward and get through the week. We’re so grateful to Leilani, Nigel and Nicole for doing this.


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